Diabolik Lovers: Episode 1 – Shoot the Damsel & Save Me the Distress

Good afternoon (or evening) and welcome, everyone, to my very first attempt at writing episode-by-episode snippets for an anime! I figured it was time to step outside of my comfort zone and try something that has always interested me yet intimidated me at the same time! If you were to ask my why I am intimidated by episodic musings, I would laugh awkwardly at you and then run away because… I honestly have no fricking clue! Frankly, it very well could be the commitment aspect of it and the fear of falling behind. Yeah, that makes the most sense in me brain.

Anyhoo, the best way to conquer that and stop being afraid is to face the fear and DO IT! So… Diabolik Lovers will be my lab rat for this experiment. Since I am also planning on writing a full review of the series when I am finished, I won’t be going into anything too technical with the episodic posts unless I have a legit reaction to it. I will merely be responding (and semi-predicting) to each episode as I watch them. I chose Diabolik Lovers because one of my closest friends really wants me to watch it and review it (a.k.a.: rip it apart), and I figured since the episodes and the first season are short, it is the perfect candidate! It will either be a hot, janky mess, or hilariously entertaining, or BOTH!

Okay, enough of that beeswax, let’s kick this thing off!


Oh man, where do I even begin?! If I were to start by saying my immediate reaction to this episode, it would have to be, “Are you fucking kidding me? If some slime-ball with hot-pink-emo-hair felt me up, I’d kick him in the bollucks and run the hell out of there!” Seriously though! What kind of father sends their kid to a gloomy castle with a bunch of hormonal, molesty, boys?

Ah, that felt nice to get off my chest.

Okay, after finishing the episode, I laughed quite a bit. It seems like a straightforward harem where the guys are all jerks and the woman is passed around between them until she inevitably falls for one. It’s also rather obvious that this is an adaption of a video game, as almost all of the dudes got a taste of her. I can already tell that I hate the boy with purple hair who looks like he’s twelve-years-old. Kid, you need some serious therapy… Well, all of you do, but you most of all… and a new, non-Bieber haircut!

All the guys are so intense, even the ones that try to be aloof and flirty, and my reaction to most of them consisted of an eye-roll. I will admit that Shū is the most appealing to me, mostly because he seems like he’s absolutely done with his family and their bullshit, and just wants to be left the hell alone. A part of me sincerely wishes that this aspect of his personality will stick around, but the other part is curious as to what he will be like when he loses his temper. Will he be as much of a jerk as the red-haired Ayato? Or is he a different sort of beast entirely?

DL Eps. 01 f

“If I pretend they don’t exist, maybe they’ll disappear!”

Even with all of the head-shaking and eye-rolling, I am intrigued. I am someone who enjoys the act of bloodletting—only with a person whom I trust wholeheartedly and who also has a kink for it—and that is one of the biggest draws for me with vampire narratives (minus the Twilight series; it can all burn in a housefire for all I care). Whenever Yui gets bit (how can she not?), I think I will have fangirl, gushing reactions. Why lie? I embrace my love for some of the trashier sides of anime. But apart from that, I may want to bang my head against the wall (or desk) numerous times. She is so annoying!

The way she screams at everything is irritating. Bumped into the coffee table? Scream danger. Saw some thunder? Scream again. Tripped over her own bleeding shoes? “Oh no, someone help me!” I know she’s got the whole damsel-in-distress thing going on, but there is no reason for it to be amped up to 100.

DL Eps. 01 g

“Ew, boy cooties! Save me!”

Also, what is up with that ombre hair-colouring that everyone has going on? Is it supposed to contribute to the contrived Gothic ambiance of the series? Because it works for a couple of the guys, but definitely not all of them, and especially not on Yui.

With that, I go into the second episode with amusement and expectation of Ayato being the first one to bite her. The dude seems like the perfect type to have an inferiority complex that makes him want to be the best or the first at everything. I suppose only time shall tell!

Alrighty, onwards with my Diabolik Lovers shenanigans! Tune in every day at the same time for my episodic rants/raves/facepalms until the series’ end.


Please, let me know in the comments if you have seen this series, and/or if there is anything precise you’d like me to cover with future episodic posts. For this series specifically, as I mentioned above, my plan is to stick to unfiltered reactions, no matter how silly or eccentric or ridiculous they may be. Nevertheless, I am super open to suggestions for future episode-by-episode segments.


Thank you so much for visiting me today. I appreciate the support! Until next time, keep reading and keep otakuing. 💜


Hello, friends! If you enjoy my content, please consider supporting me with a one-time Ko-Fi ($3) donation, so that I can pay for my medications, and for the maintenance and upkeep of the blog! I would greatly appreciate any ounce of support you could provide. Thank you. 🖤

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13 thoughts on “Diabolik Lovers: Episode 1 – Shoot the Damsel & Save Me the Distress

  1. Haha…had to laugh at this entire post, and I agree with Krystallina…this will probably turn into more rants in the future. I have heard some pretty disturbing things about this anime, so look forward to seeing what you will write about in the upcoming posts. Oh…and you could have fooled me, certainly doesn’t seem like this is your first time doing episodic reviews. This was great! 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    • Haha, yeah… I figured if this is going to be a less than awesome experience, I can have some unfiltered fun with it, LOL. And thank you! I literally wrote down a lot my thoughts as I had them, and didn’t really edit it much beyond that. XD

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Glad you seemed to have some fun with this, though I must say my own experience with this particular anime… Well there’s a reason I haven’t written a review of it yet. Still I look forward to seeing how you go with this episode to episode.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This was glorious your rant into all the reasons this is so trashy and terrible and why you somewhat enjoy it because of all those things is awesome and hilarious. Thanks for this and your honesty with the fear and your deciding to plow through it anyway love it all!

    Liked by 1 person

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