Alright, chums. I have a confession to make: I fucking loathe Spring. Spring is the season that forces me to hibernate indoors until things get rainy and dreary and grey again (otherwise bloody beautiful). That’s probably why all of the year’s best anime tends to release during Spring and Summer: validates the needs of Spring-haters everywhere to stay indoors until the blossoming flowers and horny critters go the hell away.
I know, I’m bitter about this bully named Spring.
So, to honour my glorious disposition with this season, I decided to create an original book tag that is inspired by the many reasons that I find Spring to be an absolutely appalling time of year. When I went looking for seasonal book tags, most of the ones I found revolved around loving Spring, so I felt rather inspired and invigorated to do the opposite.
01. The Time Tantrum
Time changes during this time of year make me depressed because it causes me to lose an hour that could be spent cuddling with my Kheb in sleepy land. I’m so happy that it may finally be going obsolete.
Name a book—either a stand-alone or from a series—that had large time lapses that frustrated you greatly.
God Emperor of Dune by Frank Herbert. This is the third instalment in Herbert’s original Dune saga, and after quite a few re-reads, I have come to appreciate the massive time jump between this novel and its predecessor, and why it’s so pivotal to the overarching narrative. However, with that being said, the very first time that I read it, I felt so frustrated and disoriented by the vast number of years that had taken place between the two instalments.
02. Bugs, Bugs, Bugs BEGONE!
Dude, so many bloody bugs! Let’s not forget about the mutant insects that also make an appearance, things that I feel like would only exist in creepy arse science-fiction, or mind-boggling fantasy. If there’s anything that I hate more than losing sleepy time, it’s bugs.
Name an insect, or creepy crawlies, centred novel that you’ve been interested in reading, but feel too grossed out by to give a proper shot.
Forgotten Realms’ The War of the Spider Queen series by various author’s but created by R.A. Salvatore. Okay, so the super unusual thing about me that I honestly couldn’t explain to you mates even I tried is my obsession for Lloth, the Spider Queen (Drow deity) within the Forgotten Realms fantasy universe. I think it may have more to do with my obsession for Drow (dark elves) than anything else, but still. It’s stupefying. I have had this series sitting on my shelf for years. It has everything I love in fantasy: magical creatures, lots of political intrigue, assassins, tons of morally grey (or straight up black as blight) characters, and a frighteningly alluring goddess. Nevertheless… spiders, mate. Mother-effing Spiders. They are talked about in detail, and I’m referring to the webs and anatomy and other titbits.
03. Tax Trouble
I don’t really have many issues with doing taxes other than the fact that they are a pain in the arse and can be somewhat complicated, depending on how you need to file them. Also, if you end up having to pay, regardless of the amount, it feels horrid. Oh… and most of the time I forget about them until Sir Besty yells at me to wake up and get ‘em out of the way. They’re just a seasonal inconvenience rather than something I hate passionately.
Name a special/limited/deluxe edition of a book you own that you feel was not worth the monetary investment. If you don’t have one, then flip it: name a special/limited/deluxe edition of a book you own that you feel is worth every fricking penny.
It physically pains me to say this because it feels very blasphemous, but I’m going with The Legend of Zelda Encyclopaedia Deluxe Edition. It is a breath-taking edition of something that is a must-have for all franchise fans, but it MSRPs at $80 and, honestly, it’s not worth that price. Sixty dollars maybe, eighty? Nope. The exterior aesthetics are stunning and wonderfully nostalgic, but the interior content is not different from the regular version, I’d know, I own them both (I’m obsessed with Zelda, don’t judge me).
For something that is worth it, I have so many that I feel were brilliantly worth their cost, however, to keep myself from going bonkers with indecision, I shall refer to my latest acquisition, Berserk Deluxe Edition Volume 1. It’s a leather-bound brick of a book that weighs approximately four pounds, which may not sound like a lot, but for a book, you can bet your arse it is. It is one of the most beautiful books I own. It MSRPs for $50 and deserves every cent.
04. Atrocious Allergies
Oh, you knew that this pesky little bloke had to be on the list somewhere, right? My allergies are so fucking ghastly during this season that I have to take one 24-hour allergy pill every 12-hours because that’s how long they actually work in my system. But come Fall and Winter, I can swallow ‘em like normal, or even go a couple of days without taking them at all.
Name a book that you loathed so fricking much, that you may as well be allergic to it.
I’m going to use another semi-recent book for this, Six-Gun Snow White by Catherynne Valente. This is one of the most offensive fucking books that I have ever read. It’s horrendously racist, specifically where Native Americans are concerned. Natives are compared to animals and being savage and wild, while White people are described as being from these gorgeous mysterious lands and being people of beauty to be admired and envied, especially by the “dirty-skinned savages”. Um, how about fuck you, you bloody twat.
05. Moody Meteorology
The weather can never make up it’s mind with regards to being hot, cold, rainy, dry, or whatever else, and also no one can agree on a similar weather report (this is true for where I live, at least), making them utterly pointless. It’s very difficult to dress for weather that likes to change its mind literally every ten minutes. This is why I stay home, so I can remain in my pyjamas the entire time.
Name a book, or book series, that has inconsistencies that drove you baddy.
A Song of Ice and Fire by George R.R. Martin, specifically the last two books in the series. This isn’t really a plot inconsistency, as is it more of a format one. In the first two to three books, each chapter is indicated with the character’s name, thus letting you know the perspective of whom you shall be reading. Yet, in the last two books, rather than using the character’s names, the author switched it up and used identifying markers instead (such as nicknames, for example, and some of which were actual spoilers to an extent), and they were almost never the same. I hated this so much. It threw off my whole vibe while reading through the series (I read them all back-to-back). I feel this isn’t so horrible if you read them with a decent bit of space in the middle, but when you are marathon reading them, it’s quite annoying. I may be alone with my petty whining here, which is okay.
That does it for the I Hate Spring Book Tag! If you decide to do this tag on your own space, you don’t have to include my titbits where I chat about why I chose these particular things. You can just use the title and question. Also, if you could credit me since I created it, I’d be ever-so-appreciative.
Thank you so much for visiting me today. I appreciate the support! Until next time, keep reading and keep otakuing. 🌸
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