Day 12: Saddest Anime Scene:
**NOTE: There will be major spoilers for A Place Further Than the Universe! Read at your own discretion!! Also, this will be a sad post.**
There is a scene in the Winter 2018 anime, A Place Further Than the Universe, towards the very end of the season that was by far one of the bloodiest fucking emotional things I have ever seen in my life. I’m 100% sure that my reaction to this scene was wholeheartedly personal as it reminded me of my brother who died a few years ago. Here is the scene:
When Shirase Kobuchizawa discovers her mother’s laptop in Antarctica, she boots it up to find every email she had ever sent her mother since her disappearance over a year ago sitting in the Inbox… unread. She begins to sob as the intensely painful reality of her mother’s death finally sinks in. The numbers just keep increasing and her sobbing turns into a full-on break-down that shakes her to the core. As she has this breakdown in her room, her friends sit outside the door and sob silently, sharing in their friend’s agony and grief.
I am crying as I type this up right now. Just thinking about it… The tears stream down my cheeks as I struggle to string together words on this blurry ass fucking keyboard.
A few years ago, I lost the single most important person in my life. I have written letters to him, letters I keep in a journal where I share what my life has become, or letters where I just beg for his guidance. Not a moment goes by when I don’t wake up the next day and hope that, by some stupid fucking miracle, I’ll have a reply from him waiting for me on my desk.
That scene from this anime… it fucking broke me. It brought everything I had ever felt about my brother’s death, everything I refused to acknowledge or accept, everything I tried my hardest to hide, straight to the fucking surface, ripping it out of my chest and shoving it into my face. It was beautiful but so, so, so heart-breaking. After the episode ended, I just sat at my desk and cried like I hadn’t cried in years. I have never seen any anime capture the unbearable essence of loss so damn well before. I will never forget it. Never.